The thing about stuff is…

<h1>I’m learning HTML</h1>

Sub Main()
Console.WriteLine(“And Visual Basic “)
End Sub

I’m mostly doing this in the hopes of moving out of forensic science and into IT support. A bizzare career aspiration I know but to be honest I’ve about all I can take of pipettes and anti-contamination measures so subroutines are looking pretty damn appealing right now.

In other news I’m going to pick up Settlers of Catan today which will bring the number of awsome board games I have up to several. Sunday games days are going very well, too well in fact as we had 9 for games last week and there are no 9 player games.

That’s all for now because I have to go places.

Top five things that I can think of right now

1. Dragon Age II – My flat mate is playing it. It looks alot like Dragonage I (which is probably a good thing) although Blood mages don’t seem quite so awsome which is, on balance, a bad thing.

2. Bulleit Bourbon – I’m drinking it. Had a long day at work (12 hours, and it’s a Saturday) so stopped off in the magic liquor store on the way home and purchased a bottle. I have to say it’s a peach! Mighty smooth with maybe a tint of orangeyness.

3. Sendai – Spent alot of today watching the live news updates about the earthquake/tsunami/nuclear meltdown/etc. I actually felt a bit emotional about the international response and the fact that humans do somethimes try to help each other out. Those who know me know that I’ve almost entirely given up on the Human race so it’s nice to occationally be proven wrong. That said the international community is probably only using this an an excuse to get in and steal all of Japan’s giant robots, sushi knives and tentacle rape porn. The sadest moment was when I saw a picture of a man standing in the remains of his pottery shop.

4. Thomas the Tank engine (the origianl narrated by Ringo Starr) – When I was very young my parents recorded the first two seasons of this for me. Growing up I would always watch the videos when I was ill or depressed and they became good friends. Now I’ve not had a working VCR for years and I wouldn’t have wanted to risk putting them in anyway for fear of breakage but from a sentimental point of view there videos are like gold bars. The other week I finally got round to having them transfered and have since spent many happy hours rewatching them. It’s not even the show I love (although it is great, say what you like about Ringo’s drumming, he sure knows how to spin a train based yarn) it’s the mental adverts from 1984 (You won’t get Look-in if you don’t get Look-in this week!) or snippets of the broom cupboard (complete with Rod Hull with his hand up Emu). There are also the moments where I, as an unsupervised toddler, accidentally pressed record saving both an except from gone with the wind during a race between Thomas and Bertie and later most of the original home and away theme-tune during the first Duck vs Diesel saga. Anyway point 4 is a little on the large side but I’m happy so fuck anyone who thinks otherwise! Also you can watch Thomas the Tank engine on youtube so you really should.

5. Pictures which are funny for a very specific reason – For example:

Which is funny because the mouse should know that the duck can talk, they make love after all.

 

Or this gem:

Which, as you’ve probably realised, is funny because the death row convict eats a gun, which is obviously impossible.

My other car is half a bottle of whisky and shut the hell up you don’t know me motherfucker!

It’s been well over a year since I wrote anything in this blog and it’ll probably be well over a year since I write in it again. No-one is likely to ever read this which means I can say what-the-fuck ever I want to.

I’ve recently become something of a freelance barman since starting a bar in my kitchen. Somehow i’ve ended up with a truely absurd number of liquors and bar ingredients which I’m going to list now in no particular order.

Nihon Bashi Sake (That’s Japan Bridge in English, see how much I know)

Unicum (the foulest herbal liquer the Hungarians could come up with)

Frangelico (smells like liquid Ferrero Rocher and comes in a monk……..shaped bottle)

Mount Gay Gold Rum (that shit’ll fuck you up)

Creme de Cassis de Djion (its from Djion)

Chambord (Delicious Black Rasberry Liquer)

Cactus jacks Apple Schnapps (It was cheap and I wanted to make an Appletini)

Patron Cafe (Coffee Tequila)

Luxardo Ammaretto (not of that horrible syrupy Di Saronno stuff)

Creme de Mure (Blackberries)

Creme de fraise des Bois (Strawberries)

Creme de Peche (Peachberries)

Midori (Go on Suntory, you magnificent bastards)

Angostura Bitters (If unsure then three is about right)

Gnomme Syrup (Made of gnommes)

Jose Cuervo Gold Tequila (I tend to drink this while I’m making drinks for other people)

Baileys (for shooters… mostly)

Grand Marnier (Orange Cognac)

Johnny Walker Green Label (I have nothing further to say)

Jagemeister (stop wasting it by dunking it in red-bull, just drink it ice cold)

Malibu (It’s Coconuts!)

Strawberry, rasberry and mint Stolichnaya vodka (Infused myself)

Citrus Stolichnaya vodka (also Infused myself)

Morgan’s Spiced Rum (Use this for awsome Mojitos)

Smirnoff Vodka (I’d buy belvedere or grey goose but who wants to spend money on Vodka?)

Creme de Cacao (Chocolate booze)

Tanqueray Gin (I love a good Martini and the key to a good Martini is good Gin, which this is)

Appleton’s White Rum (I just couldn’t bring myself to buy Bacardi, plus this stuff is nicer)

Jamesons (Good catholic whiskey)

Creme de Menthe (What did you order?… I got you a Creme de Menthe)

Chartreuse (Strong green french stuff made according to a recipe for an elixer of long life  from the 1600s)

Woodford Reserve Whiskey (These guys sponser the Kentucky Derby where the Mint Julep is the order of the day. Thats basically a whiskey shlushy with a bunch of mint and no straw. It’s my favourite whiskey which is why the bottle is two days old and half empty – see topic of post)

Triple Sec (Like Blue Curacao but less blue)

Archers (I’m trying to get hold of some proper german Schnapps but until then the peach syrup will have to do and besides try telling a normal well adjusted woman that Archers is a bunch of corprate preservative filled crap )

Kahlua (Did you know that a Black Russian doesn’t traditionally contain coke, with coke it’s technically a long or dirty Black Russian)

Grenadine (the romantic bit of a Tequila sunrise)

Benedictine (from an off licence in Norbiton near my local japanese supermarket)

Blue Curacao (not Bols)

Absinth (From my pre-university goth days. Sadly it took me a while to realise that I looked like an idiot in clothes designed for thin and pretty people, but then absinth is horrible stuff and I now have enough sense of self these days to dress and drink who I am, not who I wish I could could be).

Cointreau (like triple sec, but better)

Dry Vermouth (To be placed near my Martinis, but never quite it)

Lagavulin Scotch Whisky (A gift from a Norwegian druid)

Martel Brandy

Southern Comfort

Jack

and finally Famous Groose (in case I cut myself cutting lemons and need to sterilise the wound)

“In a moment of fear, you dig in your heels, the pills won’t help you now” – at 4 minutes and 30 seconds, possibly my favorite moment in a song. There are songs I like better, choruses and verses and lines I like better but I think that the shrill electronic sounds at that moment so perfectly reflect the sentiment of the song.

As for TV I’m currently watching my way through BSG which is a very fine show with excellent characters and plots (if a little heavy at times, well ok, all the time). For anyone who’s never considered it I’d say it’s well worth a look. It starts off with two feature length episodes which together stand alone as a story of the end of civilization. If you enjoy those (and I’m pretty sure you will) then you have 4 seasons of quality TV to look forward to. And it didn’t even get cancelled.

I suppose in the end it’s like John Wayne said, “Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway”

On a more philosophical note, can you sink a duck?

Damn you!!!

Having thought better of it I’ve decided to heavily edit this post. Mostly because someone could have got a link to my blog from elsewhere.

Best tuesday ever

Today I finished work at 3pm and I have the next 3 days off during which time John, Colley and Andy will be down for tarot and drinking.

In addition to that I’ve almost finalised plans for Japan trip mkIII which will include my first time in Tokyo and my first time staying at a Ryokan on Miyajima Island (An island where it’s illegal to die or be born) not to mention the obvious awsomeness of seeing the Williamses.

As if this wasn’t enough I was given £30 as a reward for being super awsome at work.

Oh, and my flat mate has ordered Modern Warfare II which should arrive tomorrow just in time for him to bring it home and then leave for Wakefield until Tuesday.

In slightly worse news I’ve become addicted to deviantART. I can happily spend hours at a time typing in random keywords and adding the results to my screensaver.

Hope you all are in good health, Beach

I’m sure I’ll understand all this one day but not tonight…… not tonight.

So…. it seems I’m drunk. Who’d have thought? Anywho I don’t really know what I’m saying. I guess nothing really. Unlike Matt Stone and Trey Parker, have you ever noticed how they’re always saying something. Seriously, South park is funny as fuck but its always got a point to make, just like that sodding Esop fellow and his goody two shoes (who in the fuck dosn’t have 2 shoes…..what the fuck) fables. Sooooo, it turns out I’m hungry as fuck but I’m worried that if I cook I’ll burn the house down. On the other hand my good buddy Rak Dogg is cooking chicken burgers and damn do they smell good. I may have to risk it.

It seems that when smashed I don’t use punctuation so have a new paragraph you mother! Soooo.. I’m going to cook salmon fishcakes and steal some of my good buddy Rak Dogg’s bread in order to convert it into a fully functioning sand witch. man is it difficult to type when you’re so drunk you keep hitting the wrong keys but you’re such a perfectionist you can’t let a spelling mistake go >_<

Food time, must fly

Gentlemen!

Alow me to bring to order this not quite annual genral meeting of the surviving members of the PGGC (est. 1802).

I’ve always felt that it’s best to keep these things brief.